


side effects

by hjsuwu



Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: Character Death, Depression, Eating Disorders, I'm serious be careful, Major character death - Freeform, Self-Harm, Side Effects, Suicide
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-18
Updated: 2020-08-18
Packaged: 2021-03-06 02:00:26
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 15
Words: 612
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25975585
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hjsuwu/pseuds/hjsuwu
Summary: but what about the side effects?did you consider them?TRIGGER WARNINGgraphic description of suicide, eating disorder and self harm
Kudos: 22





	1. common side effects include

this story will contain triggering content so please read with care

english is not my first language so please call out mistakes because i want to improve

i found the full sentence in a comment under "classical musicians react to stray kids side effects"

common side effects include: nervousness, insomnia, nausea, agitation, anxiety, stomach pain, sweating, vision problems, psychosis, numbness, dizziness, headaches, weight loss, central-


	2. nervousness

chan was nervous.  
you wouldn't be able to understand how nervous.

his chest felt like exploding.  
everytime he spoke, you could hear his voice shaking.

but there's a possibility, that flowers will bloom out of his chest.  
so maybe being nervous wasn't that bad.

but it was.

because flowers only grow in beautiful places.


	3. insomnia

he couldn't sleep.  
his head screamed so loud, his lungs could never.

he could try all those self care sleeping tips but then again.  
it's nice being relatable.

it's nice to relate.

so why stop being depressed when it feels so so good?


	4. nausea

he could've left all his food behind.  
but.

he felt bad for it.  
a wave of nausea hit him. devoured him.

addicted.  
he was addicted to the feeling of sickness.

his feeling of nausea.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm doing uploading this with my mobile data haha me big dumb


	5. agitation

excitement.  
anxiety.  
happiness.

what is this feeling?  
he didn't know.

but the red color against his skin looked good.

the silver in his hand let him breathe.  
finally.


	6. anxiety

screaming.  
shouting.  
laughing.

were they laughing at him?

did he look that bad?

was it his hair? his outfit? the way he walks? the way he talks? his pimple with 100 layers of make up covering it?

stop looking. stop laughing. stop breathing.

"i'm scared", chan said, while looking in the mirror, laughing at himself.


	7. stomach pain

his stomach was aching.  
longing for food.

"i've got some tummy pain", he said, smiling.

smelling the cheeseburger, crying on the inside.


	8. sweating

sweat was covering chans skin.

some people said it's beautiful.  
he thought it's disgusting.

he thought, he is disgusting.

"stop smiling at me", he thought.  
while he smiled at you, telling him how pretty he looked.


	9. vision problems

crying sure did cause some vision problems.

not being able to see the porn on his screen, because the loneliness hit him.  
not being able to cum.

because did he even deserve that?

did he deserve that affection?

obviously not.


	10. psychosis

chan thought, he is going psycho.

all the voices, telling him to just do it.

he wanted the happy thoughts back

but then again, did he?


	11. numbness

feeling nothing.  
it was scary.

scarier than going shopping.  
scarier than calling something.  
scarier than asking someone to meet up, because you fear the rejection.

because you only realise your numb,

when it's too late.


	12. dizziness

after taking those pills.  
dizziness hit chans brain.

"the first feeling in a while", he thought, swallowing the last pill.

hoping to feel something again


	13. headaches

he wanted to feel again.  
but now all he's stuck with, is those headaches.

not even lonliness wanted to see him.

so he tried again.


	14. weight loss

weight loss is something, he hoped would come.

but now, laying here on the bathroom floor.

he realised how little that matters.  
how little he matters.

so this time, it worked.


	15. central-

it was too late.

he couldn't experience his last side effect.

how everyone shattered at the news.

bang chan, famous singer and leader of stray kids has been found dead.

crying, screaming, shouting.

side effects.  
more deaths.

han jisung, famous rapper and member of stray kids has been found dead.  
seo changbin, famous rapper and member of stray kids attempted suicide.  
lee felix taking a break from kpop, for his own mental health.

stray kids disbanding? two dead members and many with major depression. is this the end?

those are chans side effects.


End file.
